The Assasination Of A Beloved Children's Character.... Part two

Part one of the story can be read HERE

BIG EARS LOOKED AT NODDY WHO IN TURN LOOKED STRAIGHT BACK AT BIG EARS.  THEY BOTH HAD THE LOOK OF FEAR IN THEIR LITTLE PLASTIC EYES.

NODDY BLINKED AND SWIPED HIS HAT BACK.  “WHAT THE FLIP DO WE DO NOW?” HE ASKED IN A WHISPER.

BIG EARS SCRATCHED HIS HEAD. “SHUT UP I'M THINKING.”

“FLIP ME.” SNORTED NODDY.  “WE DON’T HAVE ALL DAY.”

“SHUT THE FLIP UP.” BIG EARS SAID THROUGH HIS TEETH.

“YOU HAVE FIVE MINUTES.” SAID PLOD FROM OUTSIDE.

ALL THE BLINDS WERE SHUT IN THE HOUSE AND NONE OF THE SMALL GREEN PLASTIC BERET COULD GET A CLEAR LINE OF FIRE TO THE TWO BAR-STEWARDS INSIDE.

THE REST OF TOY TOWN WERE STOOD BEHIND THE LARGE PLASTIC BIN BARRIERS TO PROTECT THEM FROM THE CARNAGE THAT WOULD TAKE PLACE SHORTLY.

INSIDE, THE TWO TOYS STOOD STILL UNSURE OF WHAT TO DO NEXT.  THEN BIG EARS ALLOWED A THOUGHT TO ENTER HIS HEAD.  “WAIT THERE.” 

HE POINTED TO THE SPOT WHERE NODDY WAS STOOD.

NODDY BEGAN TO SWEAT.  HE REMEMBERED THE TIME WHEN HE WAS THE PILLAR OF COMMUNITY.  EVERYONE LIKED HIM.  HE HAD A CAR AND A GOOD JOB.  BUT THEN BIG EARS CAME BACK FROM HIS HOLIDAY WITH SOME 'STUFF' IN A BAG AND THINGS JUST WENT FROM BAD TO WORSE.  BUT THAT WAS THE PAST AND HE WAS HERE NOW KNEE DEEP IN DO-DO AND IT WAS GETTING DEEPER.

JUST THEN BIG EARS CAME BACK FROM THE LOFT LOADED TO THE TEETH WITH GUNS GRENADES AND FAR MORE AMMUNITION THAN ANY SELF RESPECTING TOY SHOULD HAVE.

“JESUS H. CHRIST.” LAUGHED NODDY.  “HOW? WHERE? YOU ARE ONE EVIL BLINCKERED-SO AND SO BIG EARS.”

BIG EARS THREW NODDY A GUN OR TWO AND SCATTERED SOME AMMO ON THE FLOOR.  THERE WAS ENOUGH TO KEEP A SMALL ARMY IN THEIR TRENCHES FOR A WEEK.

“YOU TAKE THE KITCHEN AND I’LL KEEP THESE BLEEPERS BUSY IN HERE.” 

IT BECAME CLEAR TO NODDY THAT BIG EARS HAD BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY FOR A LONG TIME.  IF THEY EVER MADE IT OUT OF THIS ONE THEY WOULD HAVE TO SIT DOWN AND A GOOD TALK ABOUT HIS PAST.

“ YOUR TIME IS UP BOYS.  ARE YOU COMING OUT OR DO WE HAVE TO BLOW YOU OUT OF THE SKY” SAID PLOD WITH A SNEER.

“SHUT YOUR STUPID FAT MOTHER SOMETHING ‘COS I'M GONNA FILL YOUR BOTTOM WITH SO MUCH LEAD YOU’LL POOP PENCILS FOR A MONTH” CRIED BIG EARS.  

HE COCKED HIS GUN AND KNOCKED A SMALL HOLE IN THE WOODEN WINDOW COVERS.

BULLETS BEGAN TO THROW THEMSELVES FROM HIS GUN.  THEY SCREAMED THROUGH THE AIR AND HEADED FOR THE MANY LITTLE GREEN SOLDIERS THAT STOOD, KNEELED OR CROUCHED AROUND THE HOUSE.  

AS THE BULLETS REACHED THEIR TARGETS THEY SKIDDED TO A HALT.  THE SOLDIERS LOOKED CROSS-EYED AT THE PLASTIC BLOBS AS THEY OPENED THEIR FRONTS TO REVEAL A BOXING GLOVE, WHICH SMACKED THEM IN THE FACE AND KNOCKED THEM OUT ONE BY ONE.

PC PLOD ORDERED HIS MEN BEGAN TO RETURN FIRE.  WITHIN A MATTER OF MINUTES BIG EARS HOUSE LOOKED LIKE MULTI-COLOURED SWISS CHEESE.

FROM THE INSIDE, NODDY LAY ON THE FLOOR.  BULLETS CRASHED AROUND HIM.  A VASE, ABOVE HIS HEAD, SMASHED INTO A THOUSAND PIECES.  NODDY FLINCHED INTO THE FOETUS POSITION AND SQUEALED LIKE A GIRL.

“I CAN’T DO THIS ANY MORE.” HE CRIED. "I WANT TO BE A GOOD TOY!"

BIG EARS WAS TOO BUSY BLOWING TOYS TO BITS TO LISTEN.

NODDY GRIPPED HIS GUN AND PUT IT IN HIS MOUTH. 

HE SPOKE SOME MUMBLED WORDS WITH THE BARREL OF GUN POINTING UP TO HIS TINY MARBLE MIND.

BIG EARS GOT A FLASH BACK TO THE BEDROOM WAR OF OLD.  

HE WAS THERE.  THE HEAT, THE BLOOD THE LEGO MEN WERE ABOUT TO MAKE THEIR FINAL ASSAULT ON HIS PLATOON WHO LAY IN BITS ON THE FLOOR.

HE SCRAMBLED ACROSS THE FLOOR TO WHERE NODDY WAS BLUBBERING LIKE A CHILD.  AS HE WENT ACROSS THE GLASS FILLED CARPET HE PICKED UP SPARE AMMO AND THE BIGGER OF THE GUNS.  ONE OF THEM BELONGED TO NODDY.

“LISTEN DIPWAD.  YOU’RE A SOLDIER, AND YOUR GONNA DIE LIKE A FUCKING SOLDIER.”  

HE SAW THE FACE OF THE TEDDY BEAR WHO LAY IN THE POSITION THAT NODDY LAY IN NOW.

“YES OF COURSE. YOUR RIGHT.”  NODDY GOT TO HIS FEET AND GRABBED SOME GUNS.

THE LIGHT FROM THE HOLES IN THE WALL CAPTURED BIG EARS, IN THE WAY IT DOES IN FILMS AND CAPTURED THE MOOD PERFECTLY.

“TIME TO OPEN A CAN OF KICK ARSE.”

FROM OUT SIDE PC PLOD GAVE THE SIGNAL TO STOP FIRING.  AFTER A FEW SECONDS OF CONFUSION THE GUNS STOPPED.  THERE WASN’T A SOUND FROM THE HOUSE.  

PLOD LOOKED AROUND AT HIS MEN. 

MOST WERE INJURED.  SOME WERE DEAD. 

THEY WERE CASUALTIES OF WAR.  HE GAVE THE ORDER TO CLEAR THE WOUNDED AND DEAD.

SUDDENLY THERE CAME A RUSTLING FROM THE BUSHES.  ACTION MAN CAME OUT ZIPPING UP HIS FLY.

AS PC PLOD TURNED AROUND TO SEE HIS OLD COMRADE AND HIS LATEST SEXUAL CONQUEST(S), THE DOOR FROM WHAT WAS LEFT OF BIG EARS HOUSE OPENED.  

FROM INSIDE CAME THE CRY OF BLOOD HUNGRY BIG EARS AND HIS PARTNER MAD DOG NODDY.

THEY RAN (in slow motion, JUST LIKE THE BIG FINALE IN THE FILMS) OUT OF THE HOUSE AND FIRED THEIR GUNS AT RANDOM.  SOME OF THE WALKING WOUNDED WEREN’T WALKING ANYMORE AS THEY SHOT EVERYTHING IN SIGHT.

“DIE MOTHER FLIPPING WALLIES!!” SCREAMED BIG EARS WITH RAGE OVER THE SOUND OF HIS PUMP ACTION SHOTGUN.

“YEA!” JOINED IN NODDY.  “ EAT LEAD YOU…PIGS!”  NO MATTER HOW HARD HE TRIED THE THOUGHT OF DEATH GAVE NODDY THE HEEBIE JEEBIES.

PC PLOD TOOK A BULLET IN THE ARM.  HE SPUN ROUND AND FELL TO THE GROUND.  UNFORTUNATELY HIS BOTTOM HAD BEEN DESIGNED TO RUN ALL THE WAY AROUND AND HE SHOT BACK UP AGAIN.

FOR THE BRIEF MOMENT HE LAY HORIZONTAL, ANOTHER BULLET SHOT PAST HIM.  THIS ONE HIT ACTION MAN FULL IN THE FACE. 

HE FELL TO THE FLOOR DEAD.

PLOD SAW THIS AND TOOK OUT HIS GUN.  

BY NOW BIG EARS AND NODDY WERE CLOSE ENOUGH FOR A CLEAR SHOT.

HE ONLY HAD TWO BULLETS LEFT AND KNEW THIS WAS HIS LAST CHANCE.

HE TOOK AIM AT BIG EARS WHO WAS CLOSER.  

THE TRIGGER SQUEEZED TIGHTER UNTIL THE PIN MADE CONTACT AND THE BULLET WHICH RAN ITS WAY DOWN THE BARREL. 

IT SAW ITS TARGET AND FLEW RIGHT AT HIM.  BIG EARS FELL BACK AS THE BULLET MADE CONTACT.

NODDY SKIDDED TO A HALT AND KNELT BY HIS SIDE.

“AVENGE MY DEATH.” HE WHISPERED LIKE AN OVER ACTING FILM STAR.

NODDY NODDED.  HE LOOKED UP AND SAW PLOD TAKING AIM AT HIM.  NODDY RAISED HIS GUN AND WITHOUT HESITATION SHOT AT PC PLOD.

PLOD HAD THE SAME IDEA AND THE BULLETS RACED EACH OTHER.

THEY PASSED EACH OTHER WITH JUST ENOUGH ROOM TO FIT A FLEA’S 'EXCUSE ME' IN BETWEEN.

NODDY SAW HIS TINY PLASTIC CHEST EXPLODE IN FRONT OF HIM.  WHILE PC PLOD WOBBLED, HIS TOP HALF BLOWN OFF COMPLETELY.

THE NEXT DAY THE REMAINING CITIZENS OF TOY TOWN LAY A MASS FUNERAL FOR THEIR COMRADES, THE MEN AND WOMEN AND OTHER TOYS WHO LAY DOWN THEIR LIVES SO THAT THEY COULD LIVE IN PEACE AND HARMONY.

BUT IT WASN’T GOING TO BE LIKE THAT FOREVER.

NOW THE MAIN LAW ENFORCEMENT WAS OUT OF ACTION IT LEFT THE PATH OPEN FOR ANY MAD TOY TO TAKE HIS CHANCE.

AND THERE WERE PLENTY OF THEM.  ALL THOSE TOYS YOU PLAYED WITH WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG.  

THROWN AWAY, FORGOTTEN, BROKEN OR SOLD AT CAR BOOT SALES.  MISUSED AND TORMENTED WITH LIGHTERS AND MATCHES OR A HAMMER.  THE TIME FOR THEIR REVENGE WAS AT HAND…

END.