Henry Hut: The Hidden Truth Behind The BBC

Henry Hut - TRUTH WIZARD- here with another of my amazing exposes.

This Time it's the BBC who are being scrutinised under the microscope of justice!


If you are lucky enough to have access to High Definition TV you will be aware of the fantstic clarity of picture available to you on dozens of channels.

One of those channels is BBC One HD, which is almost the exact same as BBC One but one very subtle difference.

Local news is not currently produced in HD quality and so during those times of day when a generic local radio has-bean and an up and coming perky fresh faced presenter try to show empathy and concern for the minature disasters, murders and post office robberies that occur in your area, anybody who tries to view in the glory that is HD is met with the video below.

If you have seen this Ident before, the chances are you changed channel or got up and made a brew.

I, however, am a lazy pig and usually can not be bothered to change the channel and will sit through a full 15 minutes of a spinning red circle (a bit like netflix when the wifi is on it's arse).

It was one dark and lonely evening whilst waiting for an episode of shouty television, (otherwise known as Question Time) that I witnessed something horrific.

The BBC do not allow you rewind or record this segment of their output and so in order to prove my theories, I had to wait until the next time it popped up on my screen.

A few days passed before I was able to see this video again and I grabbed my phone and began to record.

At the 3 minute 52 second mark I heard it..... Whilst a bunch of penguins skate around an ice rink a small child can be clearly heard to swear.

This happens again when the clock on screen says 32 seconds..

Watch:

Here it is again....

It's true.

The words "F*cking Bugger" can be clearly heard twice in an official video produced and sanctioned by the BBC.

This video is broadcast at least three times a day, seven days a week and has been on our screens since 2008.

The BBC allows this.

They MUST already know it happens and are laughing at you.

Subliminal messaging has been used throughout the history of TV with varying degrees of success, but this..... THIS OUTRAGE is nothing short of the BBC sticking up two fingers to the British public.

The Queen watches shows on the BBC and I bet she has an HD TV, so she may have seen it.

The BBC hates the Queen and that is treason.


This video is shown daily on the BBC and I urge you all to try and see it.

I'm not here to tell you what to do with this information.. I'm no revolutionary. 

I am just just a deliverer of truth.

I've been Henry Hut.

You have been Facted!


I have recorded this video directly from my own TV.

It has only been edited to reduce the time it plays.

Nothing has been added visually or in audio either.

If you have access to BBC One HD you can view this video at any time that a program is not shown in HD.

Racism shrouded in idiocy.

I'm not sure if any of you had the pleasure of watching.. no, that not the right word is it... misfortune? is that the word?... I don't know... anyway, Did anyone see the recent Britain First Political campaign video on the TV recently?

I didn't.

But I do have a Twitter account and there were a lot of people tweeting about it so I thought I would have a look at it.

Here it is in all it's glory.

Wow - right?

Just wow.

It should go without saying that the vast majority of was said in that video is laughably stupid, wrong and painfully inaccurate. 

But I am not all that offended by a bunch of idiots spouting verbal diarrhoea as I still hold out on that last thread of human sensibility that these nasty people will amount to nothing and that their strange ramblings about migrants and Europe will be ignored or, even better, questioned and corrected as the London Mayoral voting begins.

I don't live in London, but some people do (so I have heard) and I hope that people make a choice is right for them, regardless of who they chose.

There is however, a very small chance that somebody as dangerous as Britain First will be voted in.
There is a very strange sense of failure around our main political parties.

To be fair, there always has been as newspapers and websites continuously find examples of fraud, misconduct and outright illegal behaviour of those we entrust to run our country.

But recently I have found myself at my wits end and I fear that others are in an even worse state of hatred of the constant lies and disrespect that MP's continue to show each other and the people who put them in power.

I worry that something terrible could go wrong and people like Britian First find themselves in positions of power.

It's one thing to worry about terrorists. They are a bad bunch and no mistake.

But, for me at least, I think there would be MORE to worry about if single minded extremists... (yes that's right White Extremists... imagine that) like Britain First become the decision makers.

It would be an unmitigated disaster.

Britain First do not represent my views in any way, shape or form. They really don't.

But worse than their points of view is the quality of that video.

Seriously folks, that video is painful to watch.

Laughably so.

From the weird camera work, weird cut aways and bizarre sound editing. The whole thing is a mess.

I doubt anybody reviewed that video and thought "That's bloody brilliant that is. Lets call it a night and beat up a black for not being British enough."

Nope. I've just checked and it never happened.

It was offensive to the human senses.

We have spent millions of years trying to evolve to a more sophisticated physical state so we are able to reach a higher plane of awareness.

Our eyes can focus on singular actions, our hands have opposable thumbs which allow us use tools and create fine works of art.

Our brains can control our every movement. We use them to create wonderful worlds in our mind and can evoke intense emotional responses from music... but the best Britain First can do is drag a few dullards out on the street and get them to read from a card... VERY VERY woodenly.

The whole thing reminded me of this brilliant bit from Stewart Lee, which sums up my whole disdain for Britain First and their like and I offer it up as a counter balance for that stupid video at the top.

Another Thoughtless Gibberish Xmas Message - 250th post special

Me again.

You know, I don't blog for a month and then I interfere with your daily internets by putting two posts up in 24 hours.

What am I like!?!?!

Anyway, This post is a very special one because I want to share a little video I have made.

This is the season of giving and of good will to all men (and womb-men as well) and with that in mind I would like to you all to watch the following video.

THOUGHTLESS GIBBERISH PROUDLY PRESENTS....


INTERVIEW WITH A BLOGGER!

enjoy.

EDIT: Just realised this is my 250th post as well... so that worked out nice.

Retirement Plans

It's a special one from me today as it is a video post.

Not going to say much more than that.

Just let your ears do the reading.

Thanks.

Temptation

This is a post that contains no humour, or even an attempt at humour.

This post is an instinctive reaction to the THOUGHT of watching a particular video on line.

Here are my thoughts:


There is a video on the internet.

This may not come as a shock to many of you but I am talking one video in particular.

Let me explain a bit more.

There is a video on the internet and I have not watched it.

I want to watch it... but I don't think I should.

There are no naughty ladies with their vests off or anything like , but this is one of those videos that if you watch it you can never ever un-watch it.

It is one of those videos that shows humanity at it's worst. The very bottom of the ladder of fairness and correctness. it ( i assume) shows the very real difference between right and wrong.

I saw it on a news website I sometimes visit when I have read everything else on the web that day.

The video contains so called evidence of a crime being committed by a police officer but the alleged criminal is not facing any charges and the victim is now deceased. 

I am not sure that I actually want to be witness that this level or wrongness.

If you are so inclined that the temptation is too much for you to bare, I will share it with you at the bottom of this post.

Maybe I am kidding myself that if I don't see it then it never happened and I can forget that there are people out there that are just pure evil.

Maybe I am just a spineless wimp and should cowboy up and let my eyeballs do the judging.

Maybe - Just maybe.... 

I've videos of athletes breaking legs and eyes popping out. I'm not squeamish, or a prude. But there is something about criminal acts, well, murder, that doesn't sit well.

I'm quite the happy hypocrite when watching James Bond throw a terrorist off a building or when Jack Bauer punches the living saints out of somebodies face, but to see a real life event take place in front of me forces me to realise that I am a coward and that I would be worse that useless in a real emergency.

Once this is posted I am going to turn the internet off and sit very quietly in a dark room hoping that world ends with a wimper.

We are all humans together and for all the idiots and morons and fruitcakes, it is quite incredible that there are people out there who ALLOW those who do harm to get away with it.

Much like those nurses who did nothing to stop Jimmy Saville on his regular "visits".

I really do hate the human race sometimes.

Here is the link to the Story. Please note that I have not seen the attached video and viewer discretion is advised (you sick bastards):


 http://gawker.com/does-this-grisly-dashcam-video-prove-a-cop-murdered-a-s-1378806374

Floater

I am aware that I have not been about for the past few weeks, but that's because real life has got in the way. Some horrible things have occurred that have taken my attention away from being able to write, but things are getting back on track and now I'm here (You can't get rid of me THAT easy!) I'm back, fed up and as miserable as ever.

Having a few life lessons to pass on and tales to tell I could write about like how Mrs H has been spending all my money for this upcoming wedding or how the man who empties the sewage plant for the camp site suffered a BLOW BACK and found himself covered in the best part of 6,000 gallons of raw human waste or even the reasons I was forced into mercifully putting a stray cat out of its misery after it had been mauled by two Greyhounds.... but I won't. 

Because all those stories put together are nothing - NOTHING compared with what I have to share with you today.

This post is a special one.

It has a video on it.

wowzers!

This weekend I managed to escape the hustle and bustle of the world of camping and went on barge for the day with some friends.

Here is what happened.

Keep your eye out for the Gorilla......

Enjoy.

Talking Thoughtless Gibberish: Operation Custard Cream

Last week I was challenged by Addman from Muppets for Justice to make a video showing me eating some custard creams.

I did it.

I made the video.

Easy peasy.

Or so I thought.

As you should know by now, technology is not my strongest point and although the video has been made it is of such piss poor quality that I am ashamed of it beyond belief.

However, the challenge was set and the video HAS been made and needs to be shown.

I have tried to upload the video straight to this post, but blogger must have some kind of algorithm that stops really rubbish videos from being uploaded... it works very well.

So the best I can do is share the video via youtube.

YouTube is also not my friend at the moment as the video has very poor sound.

I don't know why this is.

It plays fine on my laptop but once uploaded the sound is very quiet indeed.

If you want to spend 12 minutes and 42 seconds of your live watching me eat some biscuits then please have you headphones (or speakers) at the ready to get the most out something that offers very little.

If I ever decide to make more videos I will make sure that I have invested some money in a decent webcam, microphone and software.

But for now you can put up or shut up.

I came, I ate, I recorded.

That was all that was asked of me and I have achieved.

It is now upto Addman to create his own video showing his face being forced to consume some mass produced "jam" and shortbread.

Good luck everyone and sorry.

Custard Cream: 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocQwBusg-DM

A Little Bit Of Sinkingship Help.

In the next few weeks we all be sat down with our loved ones (and family) to a slap up meal of turkey with all the trimmings.

It can be a very stressful time what with all the cooking and looking grateful for the same bathet you got last year and resisting the urge to sneak downstairs in the middle of the night to punch the head of nextdoors snowman the horrible brats spent all weekend building (although I hope theres no snow this year -  I hate snow).

Either way, here is a very helpful self help video from Sinkingships very own resident chef - Gordon Blam.

You may wish to takes notes....

Creditation to Darren who actually made this, not me.

Bert and Ernie - What Is Love Anyway?

Excuse me very much indeed but who the hell woke up one morning last week and thought “I think Bert and Ernie off Sesame Street should get married.”

Just a couple of guys..

In the name of everything that is real, which adult on this planet thinks about things like that (apart from me!)

Why would two puppets, who are not real people but puppets, wish to get married?

Let’s put the fact that they in fact puppets to one side and presume that they are actual people and dissect why this online petition signed by over 7000 people is completely irresponsible and stupid.

Firstly let’s look at the relationship between Bert and Ernie.

Bert and Ernie are two guys who live together in what appears to be a one floor apartment. It has one bedroom in which these guys sleep in separate single beds. Ernie is always in the bath and therefore has good hygiene.

(should we use a) Rubber Duckie?

Bert is the one who cooks and looks after the accounts. He is highly strung.

Not only would these two learn to hate each other if they were to form a partnership other than that of convenience, but would lose their friendship in the process.

 

These guys have lived together for over 40 years and we have all gone seen parts of their lives. Through the happy times (the rubber ducky song) through the bad times (every other episode where Ernie leave crumbs everywhere or has the window open etc).

All in all it wouldn’t work. The fact that they are friends is what allows them to argue and have time apart if needed. In the end they always work it out because they realise what friendship is.

Now some of you reading this would say that applies to marriage too. But it doesn’t.

Marriage means that the two of you wish to be part of something special forever. Love is involved.

Not the love felt by friendship but a deeper love.

Bert and Ernie are not in love. And to force them to marry to would be wrong.

I give it 6 months..

This brings me to the second point.

By having a petition to have Bert and Ernie marry “to show tolerance of others to young people” what we would actually have an arranged marriage. Something that is generally frowned upon by the Christian/ western world.

Forcing two “people” to marry for our convenience would be more of a headache to explain to little jonnie snot face than it would to simply explain that two people can love and care for each other in many different ways.

saaay whaaa!?!?

The millions of conversations would go exactly like this:

Little jonnie: “Mum/dad... why are Bert and Ernie getting maw-id?”

Parent: “well son, when two people love each other and want to share it with everyone, they get married to show how faithful they want to be with each other.”

LJ: “okay. That seems straight forward... but why did they wait 40 years to finally marry?”

P: “well... erm... “

because i said you little shi...

LJ: “don’t lie to me. I may only be 4 and a half but I am a quick learner and am sensitive to the fact that you re my overbearing guardian who insists on always telling me the truth and instil how telling the truth is a very important part of trust between those we love...”

P:”ah... yes... well... there was an online petition and  ...”

LJ: “wait. What? You and all the other vegans got together and FORCED my favourite puppets to involve themselves in a marriage of convenience simply to appease your sense of right and wrong? That awful. I hate you and want to run away and/hurt myself.”

P:”bugger!”

Do you see how terrible it would be if Bert and Ernie get married.

 

Think before you speak out on these matters people.

Jeez!

Bert and Ernie are just a couple of guys. Leave them alone.

998 Words On The Demise Of The Film Industry

It seems that the latest fashion trend in Hollywood is film a “re-make” or “re-boot” of a film franchise.

Why?

I don’t understand the reason for remaking a film that was obviously successful enough to warrant somebody else to make their own version. It’s a paradox.

It doesn’t make sense.

Currently, the cinema going population will soon have the joy of spending their hard earned money on films such as:

The amazing Spiderman

Superman (the man of steel)

Escape from New York

Evil dead (although it seems this one has died a death ‘scuse the pun)

Total recall

Rise of the planet of the apes

Those are just six that spring to mind.

At first you may look upon that list and think “oh, great a remake of...” but you would be wrong.

The reason you are wrong is because it isn’t great they are making another version of any film. All of those above were good in their own right. There is no need to remake the originals. In some cases its seems stupid to even resurrect the story in the first place, but to simply dig up an old idea (some not even that old) and shit out a movie costing hundreds of millions of dollars for the sake of it seems stupid to me.

Let’s look at Spiderman as that is the one film that’s got everybody’s pants itching at the moment. 

Wherever I look on comments about this film I’m amazed to see so many people who “can't wait” or are “really excited” about seeing this film. How can this be? Go a rent the DVD at blockbusters if you want to see how Spiderman is born?

How on earth can it be justified to spend so much money on what is essentially a two dimensional character at best.

Three movies were made in the not too distant past and they fared quite well. A new original film would be deemed acceptable if the story justified it.

However, what we are told to expect is another version of the origin of the character that every single human with eyes and ears and a TV already knows about.

There is no reason to tell me again how peter parker was bitten by a radioactive spider and turned into a spider-man.

I know. My mum knows. The six year old godson knows. EVERYBODY KNOWS.

Why does Hollywood seem to think that I need to be told again?

The same goes for superman.

The day that somebody sits in a cinema somewhere and stands up half way through a superman film and says “hang on... how come that dude in the leotard can fly...that can’t be right?” is the day we might as well all jump of a bridge.

Why must we be forced to sit through 120 minutes watching how Clark Kent grows ups and figures out he is the son of a dead race and must save the earth from blah blah blah?

Listen up MGM, Time Warner and all you other film makers – WE DO NOT HAVE ALZHIEMERS!

Most of us anyway. And for those that do – most of us have the ability to watch the films you have made in the past by watching them on the glorious gift of DVD, digital download or even VHS tape. You really don’t need to waste your time and money making a new one for us. It fine. Honestly.

 Try something new.

But then there is the other side of this horrible monster that has crept into our lives... the other re-boot.

Escape from New York and more importantly Total Recall.

Both of these films are good in their own right. Total Recall is a favourite of mine. Even though by today’s standards the special effects are a little ropey, it doesn’t matter. The story, the pace and the action of this film more than make up for the lack of 3D special effects.

Although I still can’t look when Arnie smashes his visor and his eyes start to pop out – makes feel weird inside!

I know there will be a geek greater than I out there who would like to remind me that total recall was based on a book and the new film is going to be closer to the story in the book rather than a direct remake of the original film...

But my reply would be – SOD OFF.

There is a principle involved here.

If the movie making industry is allowed to continue this inaction of simply copying someone else’s work, tarting it up a bit, meaning that we – the paying audience have to sit through the same stories over and over again, where will it end?

The worst case scenario is that in a few years time there will only be one film being made but it will be made 25 times a year with different cast and a poncy director who wants to show a grittier version of what has come before”

I am aware of the argument that having a new lead actor in a film can harm the franchise and disrupt audiences but that is pure waffle. Look at James Bond... there has been loads of him and nobody said a word. Everyone has their favourite but you either love Bond or you don’t.

 Why should it be any different for other films?

On a final note I have heard of rumours that there are plans to “reboot” the terminator...

Now if that doesn’t make you want to post one of your poo to Hollywood then I don’t know what will.

I will not be attending any of the premiers of these films when they come out. Instead I will rip up my gold embossed invitations and toss them into the recycling.

Good night.

I have been advised that sending you poo in the post may be against the law as it is classed as bio-hazard and therefore cannot be sent in a package without paying due postage.

Frankie Boyle to do Porridge

Emergency blog.

Bloody hell. The wheels have completely fallen off the dump truck of sanity and the bile of stupidity has spilled all over the road of common sense.

Who’s going to clean it up? Is my question.

I am going to prison.

It must be true because according to the BBC and other news websites a young man of 19 made a single gesture while being filmed for a Crawley FC video they made in response to their upcoming match with Manchester United Ltd.

Whilst watching the video, which has since been edited by the makers, a small number of Manchester United Ltd fans complained. The police got involved the lad was arrested under the Public Order Act on suspicion of causing harassment, alarm or distress and has been bailed until 25 February pending further inquiries.

The gesture apparently references the Munich air disaster in 1958 when a plane full of Manchester United (not a limited company at that point) crashed on landing killing 28 of the passengers onboard, some of which were young, up and coming stars of the game. They were known as the Busby Babes.

By this logic Frankie Boyle is going down for a stretch for at least 100000000000 years for realising DVDs that contain “jokes” about Jade Goody, Madeline McCann and other terrible crimes against mad kind.

He is a bloody monster. Worse than a racist paedophile. In the eyes of Manchester United Ltd fans that is.

It’s a good job that Bernard Manning is already dead or else they would be hanging him in the morning.

I am not saying that this incident was not horrific or should be made light of, and to complain about a gesture made by somebody in the background is one thing – but to arrest them as well is taking things way too far.

Let’s remember that Manchester United Ltd fans are not the most hospitable or welcoming fans within the game of football.

They fight, swear at their own players, fight, spit and sing rude songs at visiting fans and fight.

Manchester United Ltd fans are famous for moaning, almost as much as Gary Neville (a onetime player for the team) and – this is the important bit – are DEFINATLY amongst the ENG-ER-LAND fans that love nothing more than chanting “two world wars and one world cup” whenever over home team plays against Germany.

If that is not incitement for racial hatred which demands a prison sentence, then I don’t know what is.

If we are no longer allowed to express ourselves in any manner without being hunted down for causing the slightest upset to anyone who may not like what we have done only to be ARRESTED by the police, then we might as well turn the internet off for good and sit with our arms crossed for all eternity and have a big old sulk.
Therefore if this young misguided young man of 19 is to be banned from the club his loves and is then sent down for a stretch. I demand that all England fans are sent to one of the colonies because it’s just not cricket.

It also means that if putting a video on you tube leads to someone crying because they like it then I will be sharing a cell with Ian Huntley and the ghost of Harold Shipman before you get a chance to read this blog.

If the Rozzers don’t raid my caravan in the middle of the night I will continue as I mean to go on.

Good afternoon.