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Tuesday, 18 October 2011

Is My Money Not Good Enough?

The i-phone 4s
The newest most brilliantest fantasticest wonderful mobile phone/internet gadget/best friend you will ever own (until the next one come out in February)
And like the gullible idiot I sometimes become, I decided to investigate this shiny plastic toy for myself.

The sales guy at the phone shop showed me some of the fantastic things it could do something very similar to this happened:

Beyond the faulty intermittent extra gadgets that I would never EVER use, I still wanted one and sat at the desk to work out a price plan.

It’s at times like this my brain and common sense decide to play chicken and neither would come out to play to stop me from making a terrible economic error.

The end of the conversation went something like this...

Sometimes I am a fool to myself
Desperate Sales Guy “so that £57 per month, with EVERYTHING you could possibly need and all of the things you don’t.”

Idiot customer (me): “yes please”

DSG: “I’ll just put your details in the computer... it’s lucky you came in this is the last one in town...”

Fool of the month (me again) “y-hah”

Him: “well um... ah....”
Me: “sounds interesting... am I the millionth customer? Have I won a prize?”

Him: “no.”

Me: “Ah”

Him: “yes. It appears your contract is still in force.”

Me: “yes. But I’ve been online and it says I can upgrade early.”

Him: “that’s only online.”

Me: “but I’m here now. In person. With money and my ID and everything else your company could need to guarantee even more money from me for the next two years.”

Him: “sorry. Your 9 days too early.”

With that the conversation ended and the phone disappeared under the table away from view.


I walked out of the shop both disheartened at the fact I couldn’t have my new shiny toy but thankful I had been saved at the vast drain on my budget for a shitty toy.

I am quite ashamed to say that I came very close to making one of the most massive mistakes of my life. But at the same time I’m really pissed off that 02 – yes o2 I’m naming you! don’t want my custom enough to let a week and a half be wiped off the table for the sake of another two years worth of pure profit.
So bugger them.

I’m going to go back in two weeks and demand the cheapest phone on the cheapest tariff.

I don’t NEED an i-phone. I need a phone and it seems a fresh injection of common sense.


  1. For £57 per month, I'd expect it to be gold plated and carried around on a small diamond encrusted tray...by trained Chipmunks.

    I think, Bumferry Hogart, that you had a very lucky escape.

  2. I know. could very well been the end of me there. cant be dipping into my comic book money now could i... crazy times.

  3. Dude, why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why oh why on Earth would you need an iphone? Can you even get a signal out there?

    Think of how many trips to the comic shop that would be!

  4. I'm not sure if I really like the iphone because everyone has one, and I'm stuck with a hideous blackberry, or if it's because they are good phones. Anyway, It seems pointless to invest in one though, since as soon as you buy it, a new one is released! 02 were doing you a favor, if anything :)


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