Solving The Worlds Problems: #1 The Sound of Trees

There's a lot going on in the world right now.

Most of it bad stuff.

From wars in the middle east, climate change,1980's sex pests and those bizarre one sided trunks that idiots insist on wearing.

It's time then, for somebody to stand up and take charge of the situation and put the worlds problems on a table and sort it all out once and for all.

That somebody is me!

We will start with the age old query of "IF A TREE FALLS IN THE WOODS AND NOBODY IS AROUND TO HEAR IT, DOES IT MAKE A NOISE?"

A quick search around the internet will offer you loads of answers raging from YES to NO.

But that's not good enough. What we need is some SCIENCE!

Here we go...

Sound is described by Wikipedia thus: 

"In physics, sound is a vibration that propagates as a typically audible mechanical wave of pressure and displacement, through a medium such asair, and water. In physiology and psychology, sound is the reception of such waves and their perception by the brain."



When the tree falls and connects with the ground, the forces involved cause all the particles and molecules in the area to move. It's all about kinetic energy.

Imagine, if you will, a very sweaty tramp getting on a bus. As he sits down everybody near him will shuffle out of the way so they don't have to smell his grubby armpits..... it's a bit like that, but smaller.

These vibrating, or moving, particles of existence travel along in all directions. With each interaction they lose a little momentum and eventually the travelling vibration dissipates to nothingness.

But where does SOUND come into all this?

The answer is YOUR EARS!

Only when the vibrating molecules reach the little hairs (or rather long spidery hairs in my case) in your ear hole does sound begin to exist.

The ear hairs send a signal to your brain which makes you think "Oh I think a tree has fallen over!"

Then and only then does sound exist.

IN SPACE NOBODY CAN HERE YOU SCREAM so said the tag line for the film Alien. That is because space is mainly a vacuum and there are no molecules or even trees to vibrate, crash together and make a noise.

So, to answer the question, IF A TREE FALLS IN THE WOODS AND NOBODY IS AROUND TO HEAR IT, DOES IT MAKE A NOISE? the answer is ....no.

Although smelly bus passengers seem to be everywhere.....


next week: The Chicken and the Egg.

£1,000,000

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/10118970/David-Cameron-offers-1-million-to-solve-worlds-biggest-problem-whatever-it-is.html

The link above is taken from the Telegraph website.

In essence it says that Mr David Cameron, the Prime Minister of the UK is offering £1,000,000 to the person who can answer the worlds biggest problem.

The only problem with this is, nobody has worked out the question.

It seems that politicians have too much time on their hands.

Luckily, so do I.

In the past I have saved everyone else in the world the trouble of having to solve the big issues of the day by writing this blog.

That is why I suggest that DC gives me the Million so that I can keep myself stocked up with CUSTARD CREAMS, buy myself a new microphone and webcam, go on holiday and then write up a list of everything that is wrong with the world and how to solve all those silly problems like war and famine and mobile signals and alien invasions and what to do with odd socks.

The rest of the money can be spent of advertising and employing somebody to peel my grapes and give me foot rub.

£1,000,000 is not a lot to ask for, especially when it's already being offered up as a prize.

Why waste it on solving one problem when I can solve ALL the problems of the world and do it on a weekly basis with poorly made videos and/or the occasional socially unacceptable song thrown in for free?

It really is a no brainer.

So Mr Cameron, This post has been tweeted to your own twitter account and posted here for all the world to see.

I await your response and a cheque at your next convenience.

Another award..

A Daft Scots Lass has kindly given me the Liebster award. 

this is now the fourth time I have been given this internet based based and have to yet to receive one single giant sized cheque.

I'm sure they will come through any day now.

Seeing as how these awards for being brilliant (I'm guessing that's what it is and not an order to cease and desist) I am going to try and fulfil the requirements sent to me with this award*.

*A Daft Scots Lass is not the sort of person you want be on the wrong side of....

so here goes.

These are your questions
1. Whats your favourite sports team? - That Local Sports team, they are good at what it is that they do.

2. Dogs or Cats? Yes.

3. Your most embarrassing moment. - hahahahahahha, oh man, you need to try harder than that for me to let slip about the time i [edited for international crimes against normality]

4. Bacon or Chocolate? Bacon. Without a doubt Bacon is the ultimate food. Chocolate is for girls.

5. Which social media platforms and why? - Y'mean Facebook and Twitter? um... yea those.

6. Winter or Summer? - Summer brings the money, Winter brings peace and quite. I'll say Autumn.

7. Who is your role model? - Victor Meldrew, Tony Hancock, Frank Spencer. take your pick

I now have to tell you lot 7 random facts about me....

That will come on the next post.

Well done me.

The Answer That Will Make Everything Better

Last week I asked the question “What is the greatest sitcom theme EVER” in order to allow the world to rejoice in agreeing with at least one thing as a point of reference so that the UN or whoever can build a topic of rapport with all the nations of the world and bring about a glorious age of peace.

As it turns out only one fellow blogger had the wherewithal to produce a glorious effort.

That blogger was no other than Rob of http://robztobor.blogspot.co.uk/, which is well worth a look see, if you don’t already look and see it on a regular basis.

Thankyou Rob.

Rob’s effort was this little number which we all know and love:

Now, Maybe Robs vote of The Adams Family was firmly agreed by all to be the best of the best and no other vote was cast…. Or nobody else wants to see the human race progress towards a brighter future.

I don’t know for sure, but I have my own suspicions.

I will be sending an email to the UN with a link to this blog in order that they may take notice of our efforts, but in the unlikely event that we don’t see a special press conference in the coming weeks where all of the leaders of the world are seen clicking their fingers in time to the above theme tune, you only have yourselves to blame. (except me and Rob that is!)