As I was dragging the pooch out one morning last week for his regular crap fest, I was accosted by an unsavoury gentleman on the path.
What with it being so early in the morning I’m not accustomed to greeting my fellow human man in a friendly manner. However it was such a nice and fresh morning I for went the usual scowl and opted for a half hearted friendly smile instead.
What a mistake that was.
The personage in question saw this silent greeting as a request to stop and spill his mind out of his mouth in my direction. The following is the actual conversation I was forced to partake in...
*it is important to note that I have written this exactly how it sounded, just so you can be as confused as I was.
Stranger: “aaaahh.... waaaken the dog eh?”
Stranger: “they’ve knocked a penny of petrol y’know... the gev-en-ment”
Me: “...yes I heard.”
Stranger: “ Eye A ho-el penny. Et wo-ent mayk a bet of def-er-ence y’kno.”
Me: “ mmm...”
Stanger: “ et el soon go ep. Mark my werds”
Me: “ ... right...?”
Stranger: “ yea. Its ‘cos o’dem Al Key das. Is’n et.”
Me: “ Al key das?”
Stranger: “ Al key das – thes ryt. Blowen ether then ep.”
Me: “ pardon...”
Stranger: “Al key das. Y’kno. Terror-ests!!!”
Me: “ oh, you are Welsh. You mean Al Qaeda?”
Stranger: “ S’wa eye sayen esen et.”
At this point I made my excuses very quickly indeed and ensured the dog stayed close to my side and didn’t look back.
The welsh are very hard to understand and of what i do understand most of it doesn't make sense.
That is all for now. Carry on with the rest of your day.