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Friday, 4 January 2013

2013? You Can Keep It!

So this is 2013 is it?

It’s a bit drier I’ll give you that. Otherwise it’s been a bit of a headache.

The 1st presented me with a load of shitty toilets to clean after just 4 hours sleep and a kitchen full of left over pork pies sausage rolls and cocktail sausages to eat (still at it now!).

Things got worse when Mrs H DEMANDED that we go shopping in the sales and bought a sofa a bed and a holiday.

Okay, I don’t mind the holiday – I’ve not had a proper break for over three years so I will let her off on that one.

2013 has also given me a chance to upgrade my contraptions and gizmo’s. With Mrs H doing her bit for the UK economy I thought I would spend my hard earned savings on a new TV. Jebus H Biscuits! That’s been a chore.

LED,LCD, PLASMA 3D HDMI WTF LOL ETC are all meaningless letters that have no business being there in that order. Why can’t TV’s just be that. And television. I don’t want Tim Wonnacott jumping out at me while I eat my cornflakes watching bargain hunt, nor Do I really care if I can see the pixels when I push my face against the screen because I don’t want to push my face against the screen.

Not even for Tim Wonnacott.
He's posher than a polished posh poodle.

Here’s hoping that shitty toilets and cocktail sausages are few and far between (I’m sure there’s a joke in there somewhere, but I’m too knackered)

Here are some pictures of our New years party, which was held in our newly built barn– which was fun and well worth the lack of sleep and sausage rolls – but not the state of the ladies loos.

The final horse race was a VERY close call indeed!
Mr Banker (my dad) and Peter winner of 2p on our version of Deal or No Deal

Various people in various states of alcoholic inebriation

Good luck to you for the next 12 months. I have a feeling we are going to need it.

EDIT: here is a video from last year in the summer of the horse racing. It really such fun!!


  1. Well Mr H that seems like a bit of a mixed bag of stuff you have there, firstly those toilets YUCK POO I do not envy you that job. The nearest I have come to such a horror was on a ship once and the toilets for reasons best known to themselves started poring their contents into the ship in a sort of horrific regurgitation. Luckily I was on board to look clever so was able to runaway and hide.

    left over pork pies sausage rolls and cocktail sausages, is this a Chinese water torture, they would not be left over if I was there I tell you YUMMMMMMMMMMM as long as I did not have to eat them in the toilet.

    I take it the holiday will not involve caravans and toilets (OK maybe toilets might be useful)and as for sales many folk have battled the sales, although we did not. Is that horse race game the one with the vibrating mat where everyone shouts and leaps about; an excellent game indeed, although all that leaping is not good for the bowels you know.

    3D television Mr H . . .WOW can you connect it to the internet, we will be able to annoy you by flying out of the screen in a sort of Harry Potter type way

    Finally Mr H welcome to another year, glad to see you back

    1. Hey Rob, I will reveal all about the holiday in a few days time. Just got a nice normal tele with colours in it and a remote control - thats as futuristic as I can muster hahahaha- The horse racing game is called ESCALARDO, and has a crank system that judders the cloth "race track" and makes the lead horses move. Its quite cool really, i will add a video above. hopefully you will get to see it. the only problem is it causes massive blood loss in the hands because of all the friction. we sold over 150 horses and had to do about 20 races to get a winner. hahahahahaha.

    2. I think it is a wise move with the TV, colours and a remote are all you need. I think the remote is brill I can hit mute every time a advert or trailer comes on. I am sure the entire population do this, it is a wonder those advertising companies have not come up with any really good silent ads yet....

  2. Welcome back Mr H, sounds like you had a very good Christmas...apart from *retch* being on *gag* loo duty.
    I did spend part of the holiday with my head down the toilet but that's another story...


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