About Me

My photo
The words are all mine, most of the pictures are not. Some of the words are not mine either.

Saturday, 5 December 2015


There are some folks in the world who don't like people because of their different skin colour, or country of birth, or they don't like people who have different dangley bits than them.

These people are known as racists and sexists.

Then there are people like me. Emojiphobics.

The Emoji (which is of itself a stupid bloody word) for those who don't know, are those little yellow faces you may see in the posts of people who are incapable of expressing themselves through the written word.

There are smiley face ones. These are used to denote happiness.

Then there are red faced frowning ones. These are used to to show anger or rage at a thing.

There are a growing number of different ones, but two is my limit. If I have to describe more than that, I will end up throwing my computer out of the window. (red faced frowning face).

I'm sure that the words in brackets in that sentence above were not required. I hope that between my own written expressions and your personal intelligence, between us, we were able to convey a fully explored emotional base line as to how I feel.

It did not require the use of hieroglyphics - a brand of text that died out thousands of years ago, by the way!

The ever increasing use of emoji in electronic conversations is becoming a real issue.

It was not that many years ago that people began to use "textspeak" in real life.

Many of us will still remember and shudder in disgust at the first time we ever heard somebody actually say the word LOL.

Why would anybody do that?


If you find something amusing, just laugh.

It is an instinctive reaction. You don't even have to think about it. Just let it out.

To say the word LOL instead of actually laughing out loud is moronic and a waste of others time. Especially the person who has made you laugh. They are busy people and don't have time for your inappropriate code words.

Emoji are on the verge of becoming the new textspeak.

How long will it be before somebody figures out a way of verbally expressing a smiley face or a yellow face with shades on into the middle of a sentence?

What will be the reaction of the recipient?

It will all end in tears I tells ya!

Very soon, within our lifetimes, real life conversations will end up just being random words and noises that will require a handbook in order to decipher the bile being spoken.

"Smiley face, ice cream cone, dog, sun shine, purple blob, purple blob, balloon?"

They will ask.

I will destroy them with terrible vengeance.

Never to be seen again.

Because I am an Emojiphobic.


  1. Well I am with you on this Mr H all the way, for one thing I dont understand any of those emoji things so when I see them in cyberspace I just look blankly thinking WHAT WHO MMMmmmm POO. . . I agree with all that LOL stuff too what I ask iswhat is Wrong with HAH AHAha ha hahA ha ha ha ha ha hah ah ah ah ah ah ahha ha ha ha ha hah ah a ha hahah a ha ha ha it works for me, although on a crowded bus can make folk a little uneasy. But in Cyberspace it is far more fun to type and can helf to cheer a chap up. Typing or even saying LOL just sounds depressing.

    However I had a thought what about if you were to sell sets if emoji cards on sticks so that folk could hold them up at other folk who could wave one back at them would they make loads of money. i mean you could have the Emoji game where you have to guess what folk think about your shoes or something like that. Such a idea could make a chap a small fortune without a great deal of outlay, I mean it would just need some printed cards on sticks . . . . . . I suspect such a good idea has already been thought of, the internet is like that think of a good idea and you find some smart arse has already done it. . . I thought of gravity the other day and guess what . . . . Yes . . . . . Sad face. . . . . . LOL

    1. That is a damned good idea Rob.
      A game of Emoji!
      Those idiots will buy anything like that.
      Emoji-opoly: Where you have to travel round the bored collecting all the different faces and the one who has the most faces at the end is told they have just wasted their life and should have really good long hard look at themselves.

      I'm going to do a kickstater campaign and make MILLIONS!!!!!!

      [smiley face} [smiley face] [money symbol] [money symbol] [money symbol]

    2. Emoji-opoly sounds good to me . . . . [winking eye] [ tongue sticking out] [dead parrot] . .

  2. Why this makes me very 😠 and just a little bit 😡. I can't believe you're 😧 at all the 👨‍👩‍ who use emoji.
    🙍 on you Mr H. 🙍 on you indeed. Not really, I'm only 😆 with ya. LOL.

    1. Wow, none of that came out. Now I really am :(

    2. Luckily for you and unlucky for me, the email version of this comment did work... at least it was full of little yellow blobs.
      Maybe my email is going through puberty or has the plague, I don't know. But that i also part of the problem.
      When emoji don't show up it makes a mess of comments and looks very untidy.
      I hope you are happy with yourself Miss Lily.
      YOU HAVE RUINED CHRISTMAS!!!!! (hahahahahahahaha)

    3. >sad face< >banana< >ice cream< I think that says it all.

    4. >large jug of water< >blue spider<


How did this get here?