We shall review this list at the end of the year so see just how amazingly brilliant I am.
Here we go:
- The leader of the Labour party, Jeremy Corbyn will be caught stealing bins from an estate in east London. It will become known as "Bingate" by the tabloid press as they have no imagination.
- Some daft-as-a-brush celebrity, probably a singer or one of those presenters off the One Show, will be caught with their pants down after advocating the benefits of eating broken glass as the "must know" diet of 2016.
- MC Hammer will re-release You can't Touch This before the end of the year... and it will be awesome.
- The Daily Mail will proclaim the following items give you cancer;
- white bread,
- brown bread,
- blue ink,
- paper clips,
- Tuesday afternoons,
- Reading out loud,
- cat food,
- Some kind of weather event will become a record breaker. It could be rain or snow or wind or sunshine.... one of those.
- Grey hair will be in fashion (I hope so anyway....)
- Popular music will be significantly more dire in 2016 than it was in 2015 or 2014.
- Children will be dumber than ever.
- Bombs will be dropped, some of them on purpose.
- In general, things will make less sense than ever.
- Katie Hopkins and Donald Trump will duet together in a concert for peace that bring about a new harmonious age for mankind.
- Your missing keys will be found under a newspaper on the kitchen table.
So, there you go.
My list of some of the things that may very well happen in the next 12 months.
Fingers crossed eh!