A question to ponder about football

Why does English football have no professional dwarves playing centre half?

Think about it.


They are fast, hard to tackle and with their low centre of gravity could “turn on a six-pence” better than any of these so called super stars.

They would have millions of fans because a life size replica kit would cost less to make and less to buy as children sized clothes don’t have VAT added to them.

We could still buy in multi-million pound mega stars from abroad. (They have dwarves abroad – I’ve checked)

It would be great.

Eventually we could have dwarf only teams, playing on smaller pitches of course, meaning the fans have the opportunity to get even closer to the pitch.

This idea has merit and I think the FA should read this post and send me a royalty cheque ASAP.







Manchester Midgets
Darlington Diddy man XI
Liverpool LITTLE leaguers

The list goes on and on...probably



I fully support this action and insist that somebody does something about it – fast.


I haven’t slept much this week.