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The words are all mine, most of the pictures are not. Some of the words are not mine either.

Saturday, 1 March 2014

Sex, Nudes, Mud, Vampires, and Slippery Substances!

The above title was offered by Rob Z Tobor as a way of encouraging certain aspects of the internet community to read and comment on this blog.

I took up the challenge straight away but had no idea what the chuff to write about.

Then the following happened.

Today is Friday, usually a busy day for me. This particular Friday was no exception, but in a small window of opportunity I set about fulfilling my destiny by laying some dirty cable.

Now, when I say "laying some dirty cable" I do NOT mean I spent most of the day sat on the porcelain throne. No.

Filthy Length

Dirty Cable.

What I actually mean is that I dug a small trench and threaded some armoured cable, supplied by BT, ready for my new internet connection to be installed.

the cable was rather mucky, as it was being dragged through some watery puddles and my hands got all covered in sludge and grime. I felt very working class indeed.

The reason for this is that Mrs H keeps nagging about the state of the internet and I wanted my own phone line in the house so that I can call up those late game shows on ITV and scream vile obscenities at the mindless presenters.

Mrs H on the other hand want's a more reliable internet connection in order to download her god awful shows about Vampires kissing each other and drinking liquor, or at least that's what I see when I look up at the crap she insists on watching. If I'm lucky I might see a little bit of boob, but these shows are so terrible that it really isn't worth paying attention to them for the change to glimpse a nipple. 

So there you go. Sex, Nudes, Mud, Vampires and slippery substances with gratuitous pictures. What more do you need.


ps- If you have five words you would like to see in written form, then leave them in the comments box below and I'll sort it out for you.... FOR FREE!


  1. WHAT my comment has vanished . . . . . . . . I will be back. . . . .what happened there then?

  2. So what happened to my post Mr H, I write a post hit publish and it vanished like a pigeon at a magic convention..... surely that cant be right. Sex, Nudes, Mud, Vampires, and Slippery Substances as a title will attract the masses in their droves scurrying over hill and dale (DALE WHO?). Mark my words in the search engines of the world even as I type folk looking for Sex, Nudes, Mud, Vampires, and Slippery Substances will arrive and read your words and think DAMN that's not what we had in mind and quite frankly it serves them right. Anyone who Google's Sex, Nudes, Mud, Vampires, and Slippery Substances should be ashamed. . . . . I would try it just to find out if you are top of the list Mr H but folk here may get the wrong idea and I am sure the police have heard the old tale of . . . . . . I was doing research . . . . . more times than a seagull has sat on the beaches of Blackpool eating rock.

    If this does not attract folk we can discuss Modern Art a bit.

    1. Not sure what happened to your other comment...maybe it was TOO rude for Google! It was your idea to create a post with this title after all. hahaha

  3. Its Sunday Mr H folk dont search for Sex, Nudes, Mud, Vampires, and Slippery Substances on Sundays after all us humans have standards to maintain , , , , , ,


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