About Me

My photo
The words are all mine, most of the pictures are not. Some of the words are not mine either.

Saturday, 8 March 2014

An Important Update From Blogger

Dear viewer, please note that this blog post has been removed as it violated our terms and conditions on the following sections:


This post contained detailed instructions of how to get an "electric shock" from licking one of those 9v batteries and that might cause children to become addictive to electricity.


It was noted in pre-publication that this post included various hate speech including descriptions of the authors attitude to old people's spittle and the smell of chicken manure. This is unacceptable as some people can't help spittle due to their (lack of) false teeth and/or lack of self respect. Furthermore the cheaper manure of chicken faeces "may" be powerful in odour but what else are chicken farmers supposed to do with it?


This blog has, in the past, shown pictures and commented on various subjects that are crude and unwelcome in the family friendly environment that is the internet. Such things as sewage plants, toilets and really ugly fat women in leggings have spread across this blog like a plague and have been noted in disciplinary files.


Whilst no instances of direct threats to life or safety have been reported, it's only a matter of time...


This guy is a menace. We here at Google have it good authority that he once gave the V sign to man who push in front of him in the queue at the butty shop once. Nobody else saw it but it is one small step from that to mass murder!


See: all this guff written here.


Bumferry Hogart is a big gossip and will spread rumour and tall tales just to make himself seems more informed and clever.... it never works.


Where to start, it's like the guy has got multiple personality disorder. One minute he's boring everyone with cleaning the toilets the next he thinks he's some kind of short story writing king. Idiot.


In 1992 Mr Hogart stole a packet of Polo mints from the local Co-op during a lunch time when he should have been in school. Granted, the guilt stopped him from eating any and he gave them all away to his "friends" but that is still no excuse.... the animal.


The guy loves spam. Spam butties, Spam pasta, Spam and egg, Spam and chips, Spam and... well you get the idea.


well, okay he might not be infected with anything more than a bit of belly button fluff, but when you have enough for a small mattress it's time to invest in a power shower.

So there you have. The reasons why this post has been redacted. For your safety and the well being of others, please DO NOT read this post. 



  1. Phew Mr H there appears to be no mention of Zombies,Banshees, Pointy Sticks or catapulting goats into the local supermarket on the list of restrictions.

    You cant beat a good spam fritter, I will start a protest group straight away, once I finish my spam fritter. .

    They really should ban those Jammie Dodgers, they have caused much trouble in cyberspace over the years.

    1. I will be protesting at these heinous remarks by blogger by enjoying some fried spam for my tea on monday while the missus is away. That'll learn 'em!

    2. I note the growing interest in your blog on Google+ Mr H, I think there is a future for us there, as young adventurers battling our way through uncharted cyberspace.

      I hope you enjoy the friend spam what you need to go with it is mashed potato shaped into little thin burger sort of shapes and fried in the same pan as the spam. . . . . Delicious.

    3. I'll be having mine with waffles and some bacon and egg. Yum Yum!
      I'm using G+ a fair bit now, There's quite a few options to play with and muck around with and... well..... break! hahahaha but I'm getting there.

  2. Thank God that Google is here to protect me from the sickening purveyor of filth that is Bumferry Hogart. His name even has the word Bum in it. Disgraceful.

    I'm writing to the Daily Mail right now. We will get your little Blog taken down, and we will have sex with any grandaughters you own in retaliation for your vile deeds. Internet Mob Justice!

    1. OI! We all like a joke around here, but there is NO NEED to start using words like Da*ly M**l. There might be young adults reading this, we don't need your right wing knee jerk reactionary hateful ragwort waste of pulp Da*ly M**l types ruining everything around here... oh go on then, if it boosts the ratings I send them a letter myself!!:O)


How did this get here?